“I’m just a girl in the world. That’s all that you’ll let me be.” This simple, yet alarmingly relatable tune by Gwen Stefani’s former band, No Doubt, expresses an intrinsic feeling many girls experience.  In 2022, a trend began to circulate on TikTok where women posted videos using No Doubt’s song to attribute their wrongdoings to being a girl. With almost 400 million posts, the jokes range from women not being able to do math or drive, amongst many other stereotypical things. Although many see this trend as humorous, it borders the line of being demeaning and self-deprecating.

In today’s day and age, the phrase, “just a girl” is the equivalent to “boys will be boys.” However, the latter makes an excuse for rowdy, vulgar and crude behavior. As a way to rebel against a culture that has made countless excuses for men and boys, the phrase “I’m just a girl” is a clapback to the narrative we have been placed in for so long. However, it infantilizes women, reducing them to air-headed, incompetent beings only capable of looking pretty and requiring help from men. If boys can be excused for their behavior, so can girls, but why do we have to degrade ourselves to portray that same message? 

To be perceived favorably by men, women feel like they must act in certain ways, creating undeniable pressure and expectations that trap us in boxes of despair. It becomes a performance. Boys can just be boys, but girls can’t just be girls. We have to be the girls that boys want us to be.  This idea has followed us since the ‘50s, like a black, looming shadow we cannot seem to escape. It also confirms the black-and-white, binary thinking society has become accustomed to. Women are supposed to be this way—limited and shackled to expectation. It’s as if a minuscule man has been placed at the back of our minds who reminds us how to act. 

Women degrade themselves for being who they are: women. It is ingrained into our DNA to think less of ourselves because we are women.  From fearing what we order at a bar being “too girly” in the eyes of a man, or not wearing the color pink in fear of seeming too feminine, there’s a subconscious need to act in certain ways to help us feel valued in our patriarchal society. Whether it’s the clothes we wear, the way we talk or the way we walk into a room, women are always expected to be pleasing to the male gaze. Though the threat of the male gaze weighs on us, it compels us too, creating a paradox that leaves our heads spinning. We simultaneously want to win the affection of a man, but we don’t want to lose ourselves in the process. 

Though we may not be preparing dinner to be ready the second our husbands get home or washing dishes until our knuckles bleed, the black-and-white differences between how men and women are perceived are impossible to escape, and they may never be. 

Just as how contrasted the colors black and white are, so are society’s expectations and perceptions of men and women. The color black wouldn’t be as stark if white didn’t exist, similar to how men and women complement each other more than society gives them credit for. The rigidity of society’s expectations of men and women leaves no room for a gray area, but it is within this gray area where traditional gender roles can be broken. So, instead of being “just a girl,” we can be the girls who disrupt the degrading narratives placed on our shoulders. 

A Magazine started in 2001 as Artemis Magazine, a feminist publication named after the Olympian goddess of the hunt, the moon and chastity. Now, 23 years later, we have dropped that name to focus on fashion, beauty and culture, but this blurb serves to pay tribute to our roots by highlighting how women and feminism have blossomed. We’d like to think that much progress has been made since our beginning, and we know it is far from over. We are so lucky to continue the legacy of A Magazine, and we will always remember where we started.

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Hi! I’m Kayla Friedman, A Magazine’s editor-in-chief. My staff and I are committed to bringing you the most important and entertaining news from the realms of fashion, beauty and culture. We are full-time students and hard-working journalists. While we get support from the student media fee and earned revenue such as advertising, both of those continue to decline. Your generous gift of any amount will help enhance our student experience as we grow into working professionals. Please go here to donate to A Magazine.